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Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Say what?

This is my kurmudgeonly "I don't get it" feature...
  • So I had to buy a tube of sunless tanner yesterday because, well, that's pretty much how I disguise the pastey white legs. Can't find my "usual" kind, or even the last brand I purchased. I found one which promised an immediate "glow", which sounded nice...the one I used to get had that, just shimmery, enough to detract from the eyescalding cold glow of my skin color, and perhaps mirage the eyes into believing the legs are young and smooth. Anyway... I put some of that lotion on last night, and there are ginormous glitter flakes in it! My legs looked like a friggin New Years Eve party! (which means whenever I use this product, I'll inevitably end up with glitter on my forehead, cheeks, or's just what happens with me and glitter. I think there's a polarity between those little metal flakes and my face) So I have to say the words... I don't get it. (even though I did, in fact, get it, and will probably continue to use it in the name of traffic safety to prevent blinding innocent drivers whilst I'm out on my morning walks) My family will think I've been out shopping for greeting cards, since I'll always have glitter on the face.
  • A few days ago, before I'd really turned life upside down and shoved every item made of paper into a plastic tote or box, then moved it to another house where I'd sure like to assemble the desk and put life back to rights, but one particular Ziploc bag holding the screws for said desk continues to elude me and my inquiries as to its whereabouts meet with nonchalant shrugs from those other beings known as my family, I sat reading a magazine one morning while eating breakfast. (haha, take that neverending sentence, literary shmucks!) All You magazine had a neat feature on how to cover blemishes, age spots, dark undereye circles and the like. Mostly old-hat makeup application, but I read it anyway because it was a good mindbreak. And then I got to the section on How to Disguise a Tattoo for a Job Interview. Huh? Say what? It was a multi-step, multi-layer process which required dry time between layers. All I could think was, why? Why would you go interview, cover the tatt, get the job, and then show up with this tatt out in the open? What would you say to the boss? "Oh, I celebrated landing this job by going out and getting inked"? This still really puzzles me. And kinda worries me on behalf of lots of young people who really don't "get" that they should think long and hard on the placement of their body art. Because, let's face it: if you get the wrong tatt, or have it in the wrong place, it really can cost you opportunities in the future. Hiding a tatt for a party or particular event, I can see. But for a job interview? I don't get it.
That's enough griping for one day, no?

Autumn Piper

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