USA Today Best of 2012

Friday, April 24, 2009

Friday Funny

In a trial, a southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman, to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
She nodded. "Why, yes, I do. Iv'e known Mr. Breadley since he was a youngester, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with andone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with threee different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you ideots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair!"

Autumn Piper
Got romance?

No comments: