USA Today Best of 2012

Friday, January 16, 2009

Vocabulary expansion

I have a new entry to suggest for Webster's:

ventilate: v. to air burning grievances with a friend, especially pertaining to in-laws, spouse, boss, or a nemesis. Ventilation prevents problems such as heads exploding from extreme annoyance. Can be accomplished via a good over-the-phone rant, email, or IMing. Not recommended to do while texting as messages are generally too lengthy for this venue. Moms are usually an excellent aid in ventilation. A properly ventilated woman can function like a normal member of society, but one who has not recently let off steam is in contant danger of blowing her top.
Note: Men are able to ventilate in 3-5 words (or zero, if intercourse is substituted) whereas women experience a build-up of toxic topics until they are properly released.
A woman who has friends by which she ventilates values those friends beyond measure. She truly loves them. They are "the bomb".

See also rat race, women's lib, PMS, and when there just aren't enough carbs.

Got romance?

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