Far Suckier Than Monday

Today's big gripe most likely falls partly under the "My own damn fault" category, but...

We got our Christmas tree this weekend and hauled in all the totes full of ornaments and lights, household decorations, holiday wrap, etc. and had a very nasty (and sad) surprise. My favorite snowglobe apparently froze last winter and the pressure pushed open the plug at the bottom, spewing all the lovely fluid out into a tote full of all kinds of treasures. The chemically spill wasn't bad enough though -- since it was in an airtight container, everything mildewed. My collection of stuffed snowmen, all the little battery powered dancing snowmen, penguins, etc, the big dancing Santa, and worst of all: Our stockings, which I sewed by hand before I even had a sewing machine, the year my daughter was born. :( Big black mildew spots accompanied by some lovely rust marks.

This really does suck.

Piper Denna
Mildew is not sexy.

Lesson in Legumes

I cooked a big pot of pinto beans and ham for dinner one night this week, which I always serve with the tried and true bread & butter (Parkay! -- sorry, just had to). So when we sit down and start filling our bowls, hubbyhead piles in the beans, then tops them with a couple of huge tablespoons of butter (Parkay! -- it's like a mild form of Tourette's. Impossible to control). I raise a brow at him and he replies, deadpan, "Now they're butter beans."

And here I had no idea...

Happy Friday!

Autumn Piper
Got romance?

The Next Fitness Craze?

After shoveling my way out of 2 feet of recent snow, I came inside thinking the state should include a fee in property taxes to provide a snowblower with every residence. This might prevent quite a few heart attacks. On the other hand... it is a damn good workout. So maybe we should go the other way with this. It's gotta burn more calories than just about every machine in a gym. Perhaps somebody should find a way to simulate snowshoveling on a fitness machine! (Although I can't decide whether the aerobic benefits would be enhanced or decline in a controlled climate where your nostrils aren't freezing together...)

Of course, the machine should have different modes for maximum fitness benefit:

• Warm-up -- aka Just Enough Snow Fell to Necessitate Shoveling mode -- makes you think maybe your 6-year-old is big enough for this job
• Speedwork --aka I'm So Dang Late for Work mode -- where you've gotta go for all you're worth, burning lungs included
• Strength mode -- aka The Storm from Hell Just Passed Over and Left Me a Few Hundred Acre-Feet of Superwet Snow mode -- you know, the heavy, deep stuff that makes you wonder why humans continue to live in places like Wisconsin and Minnesota
• Intervals -- aka Wasn't Freaking Snow Enough of a Curse? The Wind Had to Blow Too? mode -- simulates those marvelous snow drifts alternating with thinner bits
• Cool-down -- aka Standing Out by the Mailbox Leaning on the Shovel and Chatting with Old Mr. Peterson about his Overactive Bladder mode -- where the rivulets of sweat running from your stocking cap become runnels of ice pasted to your cheeks and damp layers chill you into a shivering mess of achey muscles

Yeah, I know. It does sound fun, doesn't it? Think of all the specialized fitness gear this sport would need... Ergonomic shovels with special squishie handles, fur-trimmed workout shorts, spangly/sparkly weight belts, hot pink fingerless gloves, and dear God, the legwarmers... think of the legwarmers!!! This idea just might save the economy if it falls into the right hands.

Have a great Thursday.

Autumn Piper

Got romance?

Watcha Readin' Wednesday - a review

This week I'm reviewing Jennifer Crusie's Anyone But You. (I read it on the Reader!) Actually obtaining it was a bit of a tribulation, as I'd originally purchased it with a discount from doing a review, but ended up with some wonky format for Palms which I was supposed to be able to convert to usefulness with software -- but never could. Eventually I just bought it with a discount from Fictionwise.

Crusies' note at the beginning says readers call this "Fred's book" and I can see why.

Fred is a beagle/basset mix who Nina (the heroine) adopts in the opening scene. She's after a perky puppy but ends up with a middle-aged, saggy, somewhat depressed overeater. He does help cheer her up, however, and makes her new apartment less lonely. After a long divorce and even longer time when her house on the uppity side of town was for sale, she's finally on her own, doing just what she wants. Everybody thinks she's nuts, but she's okay with that.

Teaching Fred to use the fire escape so he can "walk" himself down to the building's back yard for potty breaks proves to be a boon when he goes back in her downstairs neighbor's window instead of hers. And downstairs is yummy Alex - a handsome, single, and younger than Nina ER doc.

I like the way these two characters are instantly comfy together, hang out to watch TV, and even "rescue" one another from dates. Nina's hangups about her age are easy for us as readers to wave off, but also relatable and realistic. As a secondary character, Fred is something of a scene-stealer. Very cute. Of course you'll root for Fred's mom and dad to get together, and afterward you'll think of him often and wonder how he's doing.

Anyone But You is a Nice Bang for Your Entertainment Buck.

Up next: Heartbreakers, by Lori Foster

Happy Wednesday,

Piper Denna
Romance is sexy!

Tube Tuesday

Damn. And I thought it would be awesome to be Cindy Crawford before...

Bon Jovi Please Come Home for Christmas

Well, what can I say? It's romantic.

Autumn Piper
Got romance? (I should hope so, after watching that!)