Pitches, pitches

I'm taking pitches over at Word Wranglers next Tuesday. Here are the deets:

On Tuesday, February 7th, http://www.wordwranglers.blogspot.com will host Lyrical Press Editor, Piper Denna.

Piper will be taking 1-3 line pitches.

The rules are simple:

1. Contest opens at 7:00 A.M. EST and closes at Midnight

2. 1-3 lines

3. 1 pitch per person

That's it. We're easygoing over at Wordwranglers, but if you break the rules, you'll be disqualified.

Don't miss this chance to get your pitch in front of an editor!

Piper's bio:

Writing is a craft, a skill which improves with practice. Grammar can be learned.

Spelling...notsomuch. Either you're good at spelling, or you're not. And unfortunately, Spellcheck might be helpful, but let's face it: it's only as good as its programmers, and we all know how many problems certain software programs have. Which is why, no matter who you are, no matter what you write, you need an editor. If you don't believe me, ask Stephen King-we're very close. Like two peas in a pod. (At least, in my mind, which I mean in a completely un-stalkerlike way.)

Now that I'm done name-dropping... Books have always been my thing. And I've been a writer since I could pick up a pencil. My thoughts didn't turn toward writing professionally until about 2005, when I wrote three novels. Through a couple of critique groups and thousands of crits, both given and received, I honed my craft quite a lot. So much so, in 2008 after watching two of my books go through the editing process at publishers, I got the wild idea (the wild, incredibly overconfident idea, in retrospect), that I could do that.

My poor authors have to learn my lingo: "Innerds"-deep third inner thoughts from a character, generally requested as a replacement for narrative ("She wondered why he hadn't arrived yet" comes off much stronger as "Where the hell was he already?") or "Holding Pattern", which I type as a shortcut to remind an author to mix up sentence structure, rather than going with a repetitive subject/predicate format every time.

And I still write. (When I have time, and when I can tranquilize that inner editor enough to shut her up so I can type.) My characters must endure extensive suffering and conflict, and sometimes they do things certain readers don't approve of, but they always get their happy ending.

What kind of books do I prefer to edit? Deep conflict, relatable characters, believable plots, and a strong romantic element. Because romance makes the world go round. Right?

Piper Denna

Romance is sexy!

http://www.piperdenna.com/

http://www.lyricalpress.com/piper_denna.php

Blog gone visitin'

What sucks more than Monday? When you visit a certain someone's blog and she redirects you to yet another site to actually read it (all because she's too darn lazy to write two separate entries for one day, and reasonably certain without her trusty Piper Patter followers, her blog at the other site would not see reader one).

The point is, I was le blogger du jour (extraordinaire?) for the LPI blog today. Catch me there, if it suits ya. It's all about the romance genre.

Happy Monday...

Piper
Romance is sexy!

Things that Don't Suck - not a lot, not a little, not even at all

When I was small (I mean when I was a kid, not when I was 10 years younger and 40 lbs lighter) I had a cute little board book called Happinesss is a Warm Puppy. It had pictures of all the Peanuts gang and what made them happy. The point of the book was that there are lots of wonderful things, but what makes us happy varies from one person to the next. And that's okay.

I wish I still had that little book. There were some real gems inside. Like the warm puppy, Linus' blanket, Schroder's piano...

Today I'm going to deviate from my normal Monday whine (hey, it's the last Monday of '08, I'm over their awfulness for now) and list some things I think most everyone loves. In no particular order:

• A warm puppy. Or how about a grown dog, who loves you so much he/she sits on your feet and stares up at you with that adoring look?
• When your cat snuggles up with you and purrs his little heart out
• Holding a sleeping baby
• Hot cocoa
• Those fuzzy chenille slipper socks (yes, you're seeing a pattern with warmth here. Well, it IS winter, ya know)
• That very old, slightly outdated, but incredibly comfy sweater you've had for decades.
• A box of chocolates
• Indiana Jones (if you disagree, you're wrong. Get over it. )
• Bacon
• Gift cards
• Checking the bank account balance and NOT being alarmed
• Watching kids sled
• Looking at sleeping kids
• Little boys who tell their mommies they are pretty. And not fat.
• Bubble baths
• Foot massages
• The movies 10 Things I Hate About You and The Wedding Singer. Some things, in the words of Young Cornfuscius, "Just never get old."

Those are a few of my "favorite things". Oprah's list might be fancier, but mine is "priceless". LOL Anything you'd like added to the list?

Autumn

Got romance?

Merry Christmas!

To everybody out there, have a great holiday.

My your gifts be all you wanted, and your guests be amicable!

And in case anybody's not being nice now that St. Nick's flight is another 364 days away, here's a song you can sing them:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzXKWKaxt3c

Sorry for that, but it is a classic. And nobody did it like Seuss.
Merry Christmas!

Piper Denna
Romance is sexy!

Autumn Piper
Got romance?

Watcha Readin' Wednesday

This week's review selection is Unexpected, by Lori Foster. It was published by Kensington back in 2003. I bought it a Friends of the Library book sale after reading Jude's Law (bought it at B&N) and Jamie (borrowed from library). Since I do love libraries and can't afford to buy everything I read, I like to support my local branch when they have a used book sale.

Unexpected is a fast, fun read. (I finished it in under a week, even with all the extra holiday busy-ness.) Rich-guy-with-an-Average Joe-past Eli hires mercenary tough-chick Ray to help him rescue his younger brother from Central American guerilla kidnappers. The attraction between Eli and Ray is instant, all-consuming, distracting to the point it hampers her performance as a mercenary, and most of all - since she hates rich guys - unexpected. It's one of those attractions the characters deal with on every page, much the way we find ourselves utterly occupied when we're first infatuated.

If you like a kick-ass heroine who isn't afraid to speak her mind (and I do, which is part of why I had a hell of a time selling Lone Star Trouble), then you'll love Ray. If you like a hero who knows what he wants and will stop at nothing to get it - or her - then you'll fall for Eli.

I'd rate Unexpected a Nice Bang for Your Entertainment Buck. Well worth your time and money. When you're done, pass it on to someone who’ll enjoy it and keep the author on your radar.

Autumn
Got romance?

On the nightstand: Good Grief, by Lolly Winston. Loving it.

'Tube Tuesday

Because it's Christmas and I'm feeling sappy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X23MoTtVplE&feature=related

Merry Christmas!

Piper Denna
Romance is sexy!

'Tube Tuesday

A must-see for anybody who's ever read or written a romance novel.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vD0z1hSXTJM

Love it.

Autumn
Got romance?

Do we still believe in fairy tales?

In case you missed this month's issue of The Lyriodical, John B. Rosenman wrote a thought-provoking article (from a man's point of view) on why women's fiction (and especially romance) always must end happily.



He and I had a fun discussion about the subject, but what it boiled down to is: Because it's women's fiction. Naturally we want a happy ending. Men like to finish a book or movie on high alert, forecasting evil on the horizon a la every episode of Batman, Spiderman, Hulk... yuck. Need I go on? Whereas we chicks have an innate desire to believe happily ever after is attainable. We're in a romance for the warm, fuzzy, awwwwsome ending! Clearly we do not read a contemporary romance for reality's sake. If we did, there'd be epilogues like this:



TWO YEARS LATER


At eighteen months old, Romeo Junior is the apple of mommy and daddy's eyes. Too bad daddy doesn't get to see him much - he's working extra hours, as mommy is expecting Baby #2 soon. She got demoted from her demanding fashion job for missing so much work when Junior had all those ear infections. Then her cute classic car broke down for good and it made more financial sense for her to stay home in the suburbs and babysit full-time for the family next door, than to assume the burden of a payment for a new car. Juliette's got a closet full of cute outfits from the old days, but none of them fit, even before the second pregnancy. Now she spends her days in stretch denim and hoodies, some without stains. Lunch means Kraft Mac-n-Cheese with preschoolers instead of Chili's with her pals from work. The hot body Romeo worshipped isn't likely to make an encore, but he swears he doesn't mind. Well, he has to work out extra hard these days to fight the beer belly, too. And those buff, buff shoulders and pecs have gone the way of Juliette's perky bosom, since they left the city and their gym membership. It's all good, though. He's up for a promotion. If things go well and he gets a good enough raise, they'll be able to afford their dream car - a new Honda minivan! Let their old single friends laugh at them through MySpace. They've got their parenting group pals and neighbors. And each other. Which was all they really needed, right?

Reality in novels? No, thanks.

Happy Thursday!

Autumn Piper
Got romance?